Sleepy

Hello blog! This is quite a sleepy and laid back day for me. Yesterday I finished mailing the second lessons for the students, including the first lessons for the new students. While I was on my way back to the office, I realized that I forgot to buy postage stamps! So this probably might be the result of getting old: being so randomly forgetful. The roads were filled with traffic, so when I was nearing the office, I hurriedly stepped out of the jeep and managed to walk faster than the jeep! The traffic was like a slow turtle crawling...since it was a rush hour, students and workers were hurriedly going home thus the piling of cars and jeeps.

As of now, I'm waiting for lunch time and my abdomen is a bit aching, though that not bad. I really feel sleepy...and I'm just letting time pass...reading books and attempting to write, browsing photographs, and thinking random thoughts - basically, not so much of stress lately. I also received a beautiful gift yesterday from my parents! Hopefully we'll be going out tonight together with my two young siblings for a mall stroll...makes me so excited! :)

I'm just waiting for this sleepiness to subside.

That's it for now. :) Till next time dearee.

With lots of love and creative inspirations, coming from the always lovely weirdo,

Maica :)

Some Reminders

"This world is cursed along with all that is in it, except for these: the remembrance of Allah, what follows it (i.e. good deeds and whatever Allah loves), the scholar and the student." 

- Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)

Live according to your reality, without always envisioning the ideal life, one that is free from worry and toil. Accept life as it is and adapt accordingly to circumstances. Flawlessness and perfection are qualities that are foreign in this life. It is necessary for us to make amends; to take what is easy and leave what is difficult; and very frequently, to overlook the faults and mistakes of others.

***

Truly, the life of this world is short and its treasures are few. The Hereafter is better and everlasting, and whosoever is afflicted here shall find his reward there. And whosoever works hard here shall find ease there. And as for those who cling to this world, who are attached to it, and who are in love with it, the hardest thing for them to bear would be to lose the world's comfort and riches: they desire to enjoy this life alone...What they perceive around them is this life alone: they are blind to its impermanence and insignificance.

***

When Allah, the Exalted, takes something away from you, He compensates you with something better, but only if you are patient and seek your reward from Him.

***

It is impossible for things to remain the same. The days and years rotate, the future is unseen, and everyday Allah has matters to bring forth. You know it not, but it may be that Allah will afterward bring some new thing to pass. And verily, with hardship, there is relief.

***

The important thing to know is that tomorrow is from the world of the unseen, a bridge that we do not cross until it comes, or a bridge that will collapse before we reach it, or we may actually reach it and cross it safely. 

Since you are absorbed in the toils of today, leave tomorrow until it comes. Beware of becoming unduly attached to future prospects in this world. 

***

Former days are gone and done with, and you benefit nothing by carrying out an autopsy over them, by turning back the walls of history...

Episodes of the past are finished with; sadness cannot retrieve them, melancholy cannot make things right...

Everything on earth marches forward, preparing for a new season - so should you.

[Source: Don't Be Sad by Dr. Aidh Al Qarni]

Afternoon Snack

Orchids

The Orchids are blooming again on our house. :-)

Trip to Marshes: A Breezy Afternoon (Bataan)

The wind was very strong and cool yesterday, when we visited my sister-in-law’s relatives.  We spent an afternoon picnic on a wide area of fishponds which resembled very serene marshlands. My mom cooked sautéed vermicelli with chicken and vegetables. My parents bought some drinks and snacks as well, and I especially love the freshly-cooked corn my mom bought on a roadside stall.

By mid-afternoon, the strong winds were accompanied with gentle drizzles of rain, and I enjoyed observing the wide stretches of land which were made into fishponds. I sat on an unused boat and savored the fresh wind while I played scattering seeds from ipil-ipil fruits. The place was filled with many kinds of grass and greenery, some of which I’m not quite familiar with. There were even trees which resembled mangroves; they have exposed roots, large leaves and pod-shaped fruits. We trekked on a narrow pathway lined with grasses. Some grass resembled fluffy cattails—such a beautiful sight, but unfortunately, I didn’t have a decent camera (as usual) to document the beautiful surroundings. By the time my father drove us home, the rain was falling. 

The weather is cold and the rain is still drizzling as of this writing. I love the coldness of the weather; it’s very cozy and better paired with a hot cup of chocolate.   

Old Writing

One good thing about looking at the past and its memories, is that it allows one to gain insights on how much progress a person has made in the present. It's refreshing to look back at memories, both good ones and not-so-good ones.

I had been writing since I was in grade school, when I was selected by my teacher to be a journalist in our campus paper. I wrote newspaper articles and participated on inter-school workshops and contests. During high-school, I continued my writing, mostly this time, of poetry and personal journals and insights. I was not content merely of reading books and learning from them. I also wished to see my written output being published and shared to others as well. I had quite a number of friends and acquaintances back then, but my aloof and distant nature allowed me to carve a certain and well- cultivated world that paved way to writing and literary imagination. I would compose poems and essays secretly and one thing that's very odd of me was was that after writing, I will destroy them, tearing all the paper into pieces. Thus, I wasn't able to collect my written works which I could probably have viewed until today. There were even instances when I collected my papers and notebooks and burned them all to ashes. When I was nearing the end of my high-school, I even wrote that ten years from then,. I might be working as a journalist. However, compared to writing, I was more actively participating in poster-making and art contests, but sadly enough, my own style as a whole, was under-appreciated. As I approached college, I decided to re-assert my journalistic inclinations, so I joined the university publication. As a staff-writer, I wrote news articles, magazine features, field photo assignments, and explored further creative writing, particularly poetry. I rubbed some pastel sticks on felt paper and manipulated the finished works into digital artworks and gladly, they were featured on a small literary book, 'Digmaang Rosas,' including my poem entitled, 'Walang Dahon.' There were a number of disappointments back then, when I was not allowed to publish a news article, so eventually, I attributed it to a fellow writer. Around second year in college, I decided to quit on the publication. There were conflict of interests, so I decided to simply stop.

In between breaks in my classes, I would frequently visit libraries and scourge through books. I was very happy to find those moments of isolation where I would immerse myself and learn various fields: psychology, philosophy, history, art, literature, spirituality, and a lot of other subjects. There were many books to choose from and most of them, I could hardly remember. I am almost always surprised that while reading, I can personally relate to the authors' voices while at the same time, learning from them.

Missed Sketching & Thoughts Recently

It's been quite a while since I haven't got back into art. A couple of months ago, after I finished my last oil painting, I focused on preparing for my Med School exams, thus, I couldn't find the time to squeeze in my favorite hobby that is sketching and painting. After the exams, my time had been mostly spent in reading books, organizing our business records, and doing office activities, strolling on the malls, and spending time with family, traveling, eating, and sleeping. I even found writing a bit difficult, that's why I do have to read books to maintain my fluency with the language. Most of the time, laziness, procrastination, stress, and over-thinking get in the way that I could hardly accomplish the things that I have to do and enjoy the things that I love to do like writing and painting, and recently, experimenting with photography. Stress relief is so important, and sleeping is not even enough. Sometimes, I even think of going away from it all and escape to the mountains, or travel abroad, never to come back here again. But then when I just think about it, what I feel and see with my current condition is only a matter of perspective. Changing how we perceive and interpret situations, events, and people towards which is more positive can greatly reduce the stress and anxiety, and even our own unperceived obsessions. 

I decided to postpone my studies this year. And I must admit that it's difficult to think and decide about it. There were many factors to be considered. It even becomes an issue when dealing with personal reflections. So my plans of pursuing to become a doctor might take a setback as of this time. Being a goal-oriented person, these frustrated plans cause me a great deal of difficulty. What makes me deal with these negative events is having to accept that God might have better plans for me. And I don't want to spend my life in sadness. Though I don't see my future as definitely how I want it to be, I just look around the things around me and appreciate them, and I count myself as being more blessed compared to others who are less fortunate in terms of status in life.

Though I'm a sort of recluse person, I dream of being able to reach out and help others in need: WITHOUT the prying eyes of suspicion or malice. I wish to see more genuine kindness and sincerity in the world. And amid my often misunderstood silence, I wish that I could accomplish my purpose and leave behind a legacy that will be a catalyst for change.

Bouquets and A New Look

This afternoon, I managed to sneak out of my schedule, though, I asked permission first. It was a lot of refreshing to have some lonely walk today, though it might have been a couple or three hours outside. I photographed some very beautiful bouquets on a shop below an escalator and the blooms' colors are even more accentuated by the lovely and genuine scent of their perfumes which fill the air. Because it was an afternoon, hardly any people walk on the mall's pavements thus adding a touch of serenity to the place.

I was very much looking forward to have my very l-o-o-o-o-n-g hair trimmed, since lately, it's becoming an extra chore for me. I can hardly manage it within my busy schedule. It was such a nice thing to reflect and look at myself in the mirror for about an hour, seeing my hair being cut and blow-dried. Goodbye layers! Hello new me! : )